Fat and Not Afraid

Respect and love are for EVERY body.

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Self image dissonance

November 26, 2009

Last weekend the family went and got our pictures done at Sears.  We do this every year as an inexpensive way to get a nice gift to all the aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.  They appreciate it and like it and we like it because it doesn't cost a ton.  Gabe was really well behaved this time so that was thrilling and we weren't there for very long; we only chose one family group shot and that was it. 

While we were looking through all the shots, I was struck by how others see me, and how different that is from how I see myself.  Or at least, how I *think* others see me; fat. Fat fat fat fatty mcfaterson.  I think the pictures are terrible, very unflattering of me, even with the spiffy new haircut.  Hubby looks ok, though his acne was acting up a bit, and Gabe of course was as cute as anything.  I'm not looking forward to sending these out to people at all, but they are what they are and that's why we got them done. 

In my head, I don't look anything like the lady in the pictures.  I mean, ok, I look something like her, but damn, I thought I looked nicer than that.  Do I need to look in a mirror more, or less? I'm trying not to care but wow. 

In other news, placement has eaten my soul so posting is going to continue to be light. 

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