Fat people get a lot of 'but I did it, so you can too! It's not easy, sure, BUT I DID IT!' comments, especially if they're fat and blogging or otherwise out in public about not hating their bodies. Today while doing my best thinking a.k.a having a shower, I think I figured out where this comes from; other people who are dieting or exercising to lose weight want us to join them so they feel better about themselves, and so they don't feel like they're wasting their time, energy and dollars on something vain and unimportant (and let's face it, in the race to be the most beautiful noone wins).
By not participating in the diet and body-shame talk that's so common at work, school, home, on tv and in magazines, in music and movies, we're doing more than just not participating for ourselves; we're setting an example for everyone around us. By whole-heartedly rejecting the thin=healthy and fat=unhealthy narratives and substituting our own real lived-in stories, we're probably scaring the shit out of people who are deeply invested in what Naomi Wolf called "The Beauty Myth" and what Kate Harding described as the Fantasy of Being Thin. If so much of a person's life is wrapped up in counting calories or steps, standing on the scale, getting to and from the gym, cooking or buying and eating special meals for something that's so unnecessary, what does that say about their priorities and goals? What does it say about them as a person?
Do what makes you happy, but leave me out of it. Your body is your business and mine is mine; I'm not here to validate your behaviour.