As I've mentioned here and there before, mostly at Fierce Fatties, I've been having some troubles with my gallbladder. The last couple of weeks it's become a lot more frequent, so I've decided to start a low-fat diet (for lack of better words) in order to keep from having the fire of a thousand suns invade my chest on a nightly basis. My gallbladder has decided that Fat Is Bad and is having trouble digesting it, and combined with several gallstones that have appeared over the last how-ever-long, so now the foods I've long loved are verboten. Goodbye hamburgers! Adios, bacon! Cheesecake, I hardly knew ye.
I have minimal baggage when it comes to food and eating. Luckily I didn't jump on the dieting and body-hate bandwagons as a teen, and despite both weight gain and loss over the last near decade thanks to two pregnancies and other factors, I've managed to maintain a pretty even keel. Yes, there have been my share of days where I wanted to change things about how I look, especially the way my stomach is now after two c-sections, but mostly I'm fine with being me and the size I am. The vast majority of the time I eat what I want, when I want, provided we have it around the house or the store is open and I feel like going to go get it. It took me a while but I got past the idea that I have to eat every bite on my plate, even if I'm already full or I don't like what's on it. Now I find myself resisting this idea that I have to change how I eat. For someone recovering from an eating disorder, or even just who has a worse relationship with food and their body than I do, I can't imagine what needing to go on a low-fat diet might do to their head. I'm resisting partially just because I'm stubborn like that, but also because I don't know what a low-fat diet will do to my weight, and I am DONE with all the weight-loss. But then again, I might not be. If I was someone who'd battled their way clear of an eating disorder, or who had embraced HAES recently, it might be a different story.